Overcoming Fear of Success

Traveling back into time over the past eleven years, I have read and expressed with confidence 2nd Timothy 1:7.

The scripture reads, “For God have not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind” (KJV).

Just typing this scripture empowers the areas of my heart and refuels the dwindling flames from within.

But during a time of transparency with the Father, he revealed an area of brokenness that was buried deep within the chambers of my heart.

As a great Father and Great Shepherd, he pulled back the covers that revealed a fear of success and he continues to help me overcome.

For a majority of my existence, I found comfortability in being behind the scenes.

It is the areas that are hidden and unseen from the eyes of on-lookers that felt safe.

It was a pleasure to assist others in reaching their dreams, achieving aspirations and personal achievements.

But it was a problem when I attempted to do the same!

There seemed to be an invisible force or barrier that made it difficult for me to succeed.

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I did not fear this invisible force or barrier because resistance and opposition seemed to be my norm.

I can recall when studying in undergrad the immense internal and external battles that interfered with finishing school.

It was the American dream to finish high school, find a high-paying job, and meet the perfect mate to live this dream with.

I can still picture the image that was embedded in my thoughts as a young high-school graduate.

The wedding dress, house, dog, and white picket fence was possible for everyone but me!

It seemed so easy for others to but in every attempt to reach my dreams came an overwhelming struggle.

So, I was not afraid of opposition, and adversity but success terrified me.

In every attempt I faced rejection, the dreams and visions were slowly being buried away over the years.

I would succumb to the behavior of burying gifts and talents that God planted before existence.

It felt easier to hide what was planted than to birth the gift!

In failing to embrace success in my spiritual and physical growth, I became numb to the silent alarm ringing within my heart.

I was used to adversity, obstacles, and rejection.

As soon as my heart was excited about an idea and opportunity, here came the naysayers, idea-stealers and I would bury the idea.

Being honest it felt easier for the passion burning within to slowly dwindle and grow dim than to continue on the road to success.

I knew there would be failures, but I began to believe obstacles were a sign this was not meant for me.

Each moment of rejection, misunderstanding and failure was a sign that I should not proceed further.

It was in those moments that each dream and visions were just glimpses of a forgotten past.

Until one day I was completing an online leadership course and the instructor Apostle Matthew Stevenson stated,

“You want things to come easy and that’s why you quit when trouble comes.”

I could not move past the statement and felt matches begin to light in my heart.

It felt as if every dream and vision that I buried from the years of rejection and failure were rekindled.

I was completely stuck in that statement and could not pretend that my fear was hidden by the need to want things to come easy.

My life has not been easy since I entered planet earth on May 21, 1982.

I have faced abuse, physical abnormalities, rejection, mistreatment, neglect, etc.

Facing failures was never difficult for me but it was pushing past the failures to reach the goal for my life that seemed unattainable.

It was time to admit the truth of the instructor’s statement, I wanted things to be easy.

There will be obstacles and adversity that we will face in life, especially those that proclaim Jesus Christ as Lord & Savior.

But all of my life I had to fight!

I am reminded of the movie Color Purple, but truly it always felt like a fight for me to pursue my dream.

Choosing to run away from the calling and purpose on my life interfered with God’s plan.

But I had to realize that if I did not confront the fear of success, someone else would fulfill God’s plan.

My failure to proceed onward and move forward would not stop the plan of God.

I was missing out on the plans of God and I had to be willing to confront myself.

It was at the completion of Leadership training that I chose to remain committed to my yes!

Regardless of what others would say, lack of money and resources available to fulfill the calling, my focus was to endure.

God helped me to confront myself and continues to guide me on this journey to living out the purpose and calling on my life.

No longer would I remain stuck and hidden in the back when God has called for me to stand out!

After admitting my truth and asking the Lord for forgiveness, the hidden dreams and passion began to arise from the deep chambers of my heart.

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Purpose Nuggets!

There will be obstacles and adversity that we will face in life, especially those that proclaim Jesus Christ as Lord & Savior.

Choosing to run away from the calling and purpose on my life interfered with God’s plan

If I did not confront the fear of success, someone else would fulfill God’s plan.

My failure to proceed onward and move forward would not stop the plan of God.

Guest Blogger: Latoya Washington

Latoya Washington born in the city of Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, raised by her biological mother Veeta Bonner and stepfather Jimmie Bonner. As a child, she would write short stories, poems and would use words to encourage her peers. Whenever she faced a roadblock or obstacle, she would use a pen and paper to help her persevere. She would take the blistering winds of life and write it on paper. After experiencing abuse, homelessness, rejection, loss and near death, she used each experience to encourage others through her writings. God began to deposit words not only for short stories, but blessed her creativity to write songs, sermons, plays and children’s stories. Latoya continues to write and allows the Lord to guide her pen. Latoya hopes each poem in this book, shows how the love of God helped her to push through the vicissitudes of life. Though each circumstance tried to smother and choke the seeds of love that God deposited in her. She continued to blossom and rise above the ashes, remaining genuine and unique, as a concrete rose. Broken Vessels will reveal the deep places of the author’s heart and how every struggle was used to help her endure. Latoya’s shows how Christ’s love and correction helped to bring her complete healing and wholeness. God purified, refined, and defined her into a willing, broken, and open vessel! Latoya Washington currently resides in Mechanicsburg, Pennsylvania with her loving husband, David Washington. They run a small t-shirt business, “RhemaCreationz” that incorporates scripture with modern fashion. The couple collaborated their vision, ideas, and personal convictions to improve the moral and economic depravity in the community. After working a combined fifteen years of serving local youth in the Harrisburg and Philadelphia community. The couple came together to build the brand, RhemaCreationz. RhemaCreationz is a brand designed to equip, motivate, encourage, and exalt others with the Word of God. By incorporating scripture to creatively express God’s will and plan for his people. Creative expressions of faith with apparel, music, books and much more!